Today I will be participating in my first race. The Cahill Classic starts at 9am at Cahill Elementary in the village.
I decided to register when a friend, Sarah, posted on FB that she was going to run. I quickly summoned my running mate Meghann to join us.
It is amazing to take a step back and process where I am today.
The reason I am able to run in a race is because I no longer weigh 98 pounds nor do I smoke a pack of cigarettes a day.
I have not had a drink or a drug in 7 years so I am actually coherent at 9 in the morning.
I now have a child whom I want to instill the importance of physical fitness and being a part of a community.
Who IS this person?
I still struggle. I believe I always will. But the struggle is no longer my lifestyle. I have the usual ups and downs like all of those 'normal' people I was so envious of my whole life. Yet, when I'm having those ups and downs I have to be a bit more mindful of my relationship with food. My relationship with my Higher Power. And commit to doing more work on myself.
There are still things I want to change about my body. Still aspects of my life I am not happy with. However, today I realize it is not about those things. Just like my alcoholism is not about alcohol and my eating disorder is not about food.
So, today I will run.
Be a part of.
Spend time with women I respect.
And go from there...
